Number of states legalizing same-sex marriage doubles in 2014 | National Catholic Reporter The problem the bishops have is not someone forcing them or their priests to perform marriages for gays as a matter of law. What they expect to happen (and won't say) is the families of gay Catholics to insist on a religious gay wedding - or for civilly married gays and lesbians to find a friendly gay priest (about half) who will provide a blessing for the wedding. More scary to them is that gay men may decide to get married rather than continue on with a priestly calling. This will only get more acute as more state marriage bans are overturned by the federal courts - indeed, if the Cincinnati Circuit rehears their case with the full court, no Supreme Court ruling may be needed. As for the Church as an employer for health insurance, et al, I suspect most of the actions against gay families are about making a statement - and unless other civil marriages, which are also disallowed for Catholics, lead to the same lack of benefits then the message is homophobia.
Sadly, the Synod on the Family did not bring up the subject of gay marriage - but did bring up how to deal pastorally with gay kids (so they don't get the message that they are better off dead or drunk). That is a start, but hopefully the Sense of the Faithful will prevail in the US, Canada and Europe about opening the issue. In reality, if gays are not given the right to leave their families and become one flesh (legally and sexually), then they are forever infants bound to their families of origin in the eyes of civil and canon law. This violates the Scripture on marriage more than an openness to same sex unions would - since the main sources against gay unions are in Genesis (therefore mythical) and Leviticus (designed for moral separatism during the Exile in Babylon).
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